My life is my pain

27.02.10

2010-03-01T12:06:00.000-08:00

Today had it's bitter sweet

kinda stressed and tired too

haven't slept too

but cool thing is my friend kevin ask me to go Time Square with him

lucky

and my little teddy bear going to Time Square too

woot woot

first time gonna meet her

haha

never thought of this day coming true

around 1pm go to Time Square

walk around and waited until 3pm

then meet up with joey at Old Town White Coffee

o.o

pretty and cute

wow

joke with her and her darling mandy

she challenge me some more

she mix sugar,salt,ice and chilli sauce into her curry mee soup and dare me to drink it

haha

i drank it and it was freaking spicy

her darling mandy says i look like 25 years old

-.-

i look so old ?

then walk around and watch them buy clothes

me and kevin felt like we were bodyguards for them

lolx

joey is really funny too

make me laugh and smile the all day

some more call me Uncle Duck

-.-

then forget bout her teddy bear

she keep bit me

then go to the shop

i ask her choose the teddy bear she wants

so next time i will buy for her

ofcourse i got took picture with her too

got a picture of kevin too

fooling around

nice ?

haha

then go to gasoline and yamcha forawhile

still we keep on joking

i keep bully her

she keep bully me

after 5pm joey and her darling mandy had to go home

sad

can't hang out with them too long

anyway

next time

i got to see vivian too

miss her so much

and i gave her the valentine's day gift i was keeping for

she gonna give me a valentine's day too

i gave her late cause of work work work

THE END

24.02.10

2010-02-25T10:19:00.000-08:00

Today is quiet an awesome and happy day for me and my friends

cause they celebrate my birthday with me

celebrate at neway

we went in at 7pm and ended at 10pm

we took many foods from the buffet section

but didn't finish it all

plus i drank 5 bottle of kampai

didn't drunk

i had very fun today

thanks to my friends

you guys are the best

hope we can do it again sometimes

the price is kinda expensive but it's all worthed

i can say it's the best birthday celebration i ever wished for

and i wanna sorry to my pet sister Jasmine

sorry i can't hangout with you today cause i was waiting for my friend

hope you could forgive me

next time i promise to hangout with you

and the best thing is i get to see her

the one i love most

THE END

23.02.10

2010-02-23T11:52:00.000-08:00

23.02.10 is the date i am officially 18

finally

don't seem too happy bout it

just feel normal

nothing special bout it

oh yeah

the best this is receiving 110 birthday wish from many of my friends

didn't expect that much

wishes at facebook,sms and even calls

i would like to that this opportunity and thank everyone of my friend's wishing me

it the best birthday present i could ever wish for

didn't feel like making a party on my birthday

but you know my mum

decided to make a party for me instead

call all her friends come my birthday party

-.-

i think that's about it

still don't know what else to write

bored

THE END

01.01.10

2010-02-01T00:16:00.000-08:00

The start of February

many things is gonna happen on this month

like Valentine's day,Chinese New Year,My birthday and my darling vivian birthday

the fuck up part is Valentine's day is on 14th Feb

same day that Chinese New Year is on

Fuck !!

so vivian can't teman me

very sad !

anyway later going to Time Square

meet vivian then send her back home

haha

this call gentlemen

THE END

29.01.10

2010-01-30T08:38:00.000-08:00

Didn't sleep all night

cause scared i late to work

when reach 5am

i suddenly sleep

woke up around 6am

faster get ready all

i was so tired

My god !!

eyes damn pain

keep yawning

then i go to Tun Sambathan Monorail and buy ticket to Chow Kit

reach already then straight walk to batu tiga

so far

leg so pain

i sacrifice like hell

damn !

after 30 minutes of walking i reach my working place

River City

i was early

my boss and the other worker wasn't there

nevermind

then they reach already

Abang Hanafi my supervisor teach me alot of the system there

such as the dispenser,Auto pay station,hydrefier and barrier

so tired><

i didn't eat or drink water

gosh !

but i can tahan

went home around 2pm

wait keeming and Yc

we go Time Square

watch movie and play snooker

damn fun !

we eat at shabu shabu

eat steamboat

tasty !!

then around 9pm i go buy ticket

we watch Legion !

nice movie !

love it so much

you should watch it !

a movie not to be miss !

the movie we're gonna see starts at 10pm

before that

we go snooker center

OMG !!

i see vivian !!!

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH !!

I DAMN FUCKING MISS HER !!!!

haha

her sister with her

they two look the same

like twins

my god !!

she tell me a word that make me damn happy !!!

haha

i burst into happiness when she tell those word !!

then i get her number

i want see when she off day then we go dating

THE END

Last day of training

2010-01-28T03:46:00.001-08:00

Everyday from now i have to wake up atleast 5.30am

so early

gotta get ready before 6.30am

then go to work

went to bukit bintang

my first working place

the building im working is a mixture of a hotel and a condominium of some sort

located next to Lot 10

the hotel name is Concorde Hotel

the fucked up part is i have a punch card

damn

gotta be there 10 minutes early

if i am late to work atleast 3 times

i will get fired

nice hotel

got a cafe beside it too

mostly the workers there is malays

but im cool with that

my office got two malays guy working

they so cool man

like disturb girls

haha

introduce me to many girls

especially malay girls

they are so funny

make me laugh until stomach pain

then wait my supervisor come meet me

indian guy

kind and funny guy

basically he teach me everything on what must i do

easy as pie

i thought it was hard

but no

show me around the hotel

tommorow i have to go to jalan ipoh and meet my boss

far

i have to take monorail to chow kit then bus to batu tiga

THE END

Working life

2010-01-27T04:29:00.000-08:00

My working life has just begun

my father help me get a job

his friend

quiet a nice guy my boss

interview me yesterday

even buy me lunch

cool

so he brief me evrything on what i must do

i understood perfectly

then he showed me around the place i should work

kinda big the place

met my other workers

really nice people

i will work in either bukit bintang or at jalan ipoh

bukit bintang is easy getting there

but jalan ipoh..

so far

anyway

i have to put 100% concentration my work now

i gotta less online

less go out with friends

i have to be responsible

the best thing bout this job is my salary

daily pay !

and the fucked up part is

morning and night shift

sometimes i will work from 8am-8pm or 8pm-8am

sure i will damn tired

well

i gotta sacrifice for money

i just gotta wear a white button shirt and black color slack

besides that

they will give me a walkie talkie

DAMN !

mostly the worker there is malay

and my supervisor is chinese

so if anyone wanna meet me

can meet me in jalan ipoh

my working place is next to the Old Town White Coffee

PEACE OUT

Sad day

2010-01-24T05:02:00.000-08:00

Nothing to say

Just can say i'm super SAD !

haiz~

feel like crying

nobody can teman me alway

so sad

i just wish i can change back the past

23.01.10

2010-01-23T08:02:00.000-08:00

Today so boring evendo it's saturday

luckily keeming call me go TS

or not i will suffer in home

went to TS at 6.30pm

meet keeming at wong lo kat

my god !

he got chicken pox already

damn !

after that go to snooker center and play

almost beat him

until Yc Chong come help me play

lose

keeming win

fuck !

he getting pro already

all day i was quiet

don'r feel like talking to anyone

sigh

all day didn't eat also

for 3 week i jus eat breakfast

don't ask why

THE END

Sad

2010-01-22T08:48:00.000-08:00

today wake up damn sad

got call from ex gf

really miss her

i still love her !!!

i waiting for a chance

please give me a chance one day

please

I quickly call my friend teman me drink

i want get drunk until forget all the sadness

took my father brandy and bought another bottle of whisky

i drank so much

my head damn damn damn pain

until now so pain

i was so drunk too

woot woot

did many stupid things

like climb on top the car park floor and sing

damn !

i hate my life

so sad always

no more happy

i always drunk just forget the sadness

but eventually keep fail

SAD LIFE

21.01.10

2010-01-21T08:44:00.000-08:00

Today woke up around 9am

then sleep again

then woke up around 12pm

then sleep again

finally woke up at 1pm

i was so tired

i just lay on my bed listening to songs all day

then call keeming and chat forawhile

around 7pm go pasar malam with mum

just buy burger and eat

8pm like that got call from Yc Chong say want yamcha

yamcha until 10.30pm then back home

boring

THE END

20.01.10

2010-01-20T08:49:00.000-08:00

Didn't sleep all night

cause not tired

nothing to do then listen song while watchingmovies

life is good ?

hmm

anyway

today don't feel like going out

boring and tired

stay at home and yamcha with friends more better

around 5pm like that got call from keeming say want yamcha

he just back from work

so pity him

tired face everytime

haha

i go the restaurant and he was not there

wait until 20 minutes then back home call him

then go back to the restaurant yamcha

adui !

tired !

yamcha until 7.30pm like that

back home

got call again from keeming say want yamcha

what the...

then go back yamcha

this time Yc Chong come

haha

funny him

we talk many jokes

laugh until want die

then we take picture

he take 2 picture of me

give you see..

T H E E N D

Later

2010-01-19T12:27:00.000-08:00

Later going Time Square

maybe

go there also nothing

so boring

hope Joshton got go

so miss you bro !

Go Time Square hang out

walk here walk there

play snooker and smoke

and

see vivian

hoho

M I S S Y O U

19.01.10

2010-01-19T10:17:00.000-08:00

Today didn't go anywhere

just at home sleeping

everyday i just sleep 3-4 hours

damn

that sucks

i just don't feel sleepy

anyway

around 5pm

got call from keeming say want yamcha

yamcha until 7.30pm

got home call nimboy

and

ask if he wanna hangout

boring and no mood

so got ready and i was on my way to Hang Tuah

Got there around 8pm

got call from nimboy saying he wanna help his mum forawhile

so i waited

wait until 1 hour

nevermind

atleast got cigarette with me

after 1 hour

he arrive

Hallehujah !!

so we walk around hang tuah

we talk and talk

then saw something damn shocking

two big rat doing ***

damn !!

after that

we walk to San Peng

nice area

we sat at the park and smoke

talk somemore and somemore

and then

around 10pm

wanna go home

tired and boring

T H E E N D

P E A C E O U T

Happily ever after ?

2010-01-17T05:10:00.000-08:00

It all began

when a boy likes a girl

but then the girl wasn't ready to have a boyfriend yet

but the boy was determine to get her

he wasn't a person who give up easily

if he wants something

he will get it no matter what

he really like this girl

he felt a feeling that he never felt it before

everytime he looks at her

his heart will start beating faster and faster

from that moment he now

he will get her

he is willing to give up everything just to get her

the girl knows that the boy like her

but she wasn't ready for it

the boy didn't give up

he would everyday sms her and chat with her online

she was the only thing in his mind

he knows that she is the one for him

he can feel it

and

he is waiting for the chance of a lifetime

it was love a first sight

not a puppy love thou

till one day

the boy ask the girl to go out with him

he was anxious

he was excited

he was ready to see her for the first time

when they go out together

everything was fine

till

the boy kiss the girl all of a sudden

the girl was in silence

she didn't push the boy

she insist the boy to kiss her

the boy heart was beating fast

then

he tells her

infront her

looking eye to eye

he says

"I love you"

the girl was happy to hear that

but

she tells the boy that she would think about it

the boy didn't stop kissing her

he was too happy

when they both went home

he receive a sms from her

the sms she send to him was

"do you really love me ?"

the boy replied

"I love you more than anything in this world"

then the girl replied

"I love you too"

the boy was happy

he couldn't hold his excitement

he burst into happiness

few months have past

and they were still together

they were the perfect match

he felted that she is the one

the one who will be with him forever

the one who will care and love him till the end

evendo the boy wasn't the same race with her

but that didn't stop her from loving him

he wasn't good looking

he wasn't the guy every girls dream of

she was everything to him

she means the world to him

she was very important to her

she was important than money,his family even more important than his life

he would do anything for her

even if he have to walk a thousand mile just to see her

everyday before he goes to sleep he would look at her picture

and wakes up to look at her picture again

evendo she lives so far from him

he doen't matter

he can wait for her even if it's takes forever

he likes holding her hand

she would feel safe around him

he would hug him tightly

he will never leave her forever

nobody can stop their love

they like promising each other many things

and they won't break it forever

he wasn't the best boyfriend

but he is trying his best

they boy gave her everything

evendo he wasn't so rich

he would listen to every word she tells him

until one day

a normal day

they went out together

this time with their friends along

on that day

he wasn't feeling so well

he was so tired

he didn't rest all night

he doesnt feel like talking to the girl that time

he just want to rest

then

they went somewhere

she was busy doing something

and

the boy was silent resting

he ask the girl to talk to him

but the girl didn't replied him

he was quiet upset

out of compassion

the boy get up and shouted at himself

and

punched the wall

by then

he stood there forawhile

he knows that it was the end

he knows that she was going to leave him

he quickly ran to the girl and hug her

he was crying

he keeps on telling the girl he was sorry

but the girl didn't care him

he kept on crying crying and crying

he knows that today was their last day together

when they back home

the boy receive a sms saying that the girl wanna leave him

he burst out in tears

he was crying

he was heartbroken

he quickly called the girl

he was so sad

he even cry when talking to her in the phone

he told the girl that he was gonne kill himself

he deeply love this girl

but what he did was so stupid

he didn't think before doing it

then

the girl gave him a chance

he was happy

but

still sad

months have past

the boy felt something was wrong

the girl was acting so different

but the girl won't tell him why she was acting so strange

he knows that she was gonna leave him again

he can feel it

he knows that the girl doesn't have feeling for him again

he knows that the girl won't forget what the boy did

till the girl tells the boy again that she was gonna leave him

he was sad and heartbroken again

this time was she won't change her mind

this time her decision is final

the boy was so sad

till he began torturing himself

he would cut his hand

he would punch the wall over and over again

he would question himself every second

he couldn't stop crying

his heart was badly hurt

he was so weak

he never smile always

he wasn't like before

he really miss her

but

he never give up !

he will get her back no matter what

he will do anything just to get her have back to him

eventually he fails

but he still never stop

his heart was broken but strong for her

nobody knows what happen to the boy now

did he give up yet ?

all i know is that the boy still love her

he really miss her

he's still crying

no girl can replace her

he will wait for a chance evendo it takes forever

T H E E N D

15.01.10

2010-01-15T04:43:00.000-08:00

Woke up around 3pm

again !!!

late !!!

damn !!!

but

nevermind this

got a sms from nimboy asking where am i

i fast got up and called him

i quickly got myself ready

wear my clothes and shoe

and

i was out of the house

walk fast to the tun sambathan monorail

bought a ticket to TS

then meet with nimboy in the snooker center

watch people play snooker forawhile

then

we walk around

we got nothing to do

haha

so we went to the stair and smoke

so then

we walk back to the snooker center and meet up with our friend

oh yeah !

i meet Shan Yung too !!

haha

long time didn't see her

so miss her !!

wow !!

she getting prettier already !!

feel wan chase her

haha

we talk forawhile

ask her where she was going this and that

then

i told her to becareful

any problem just call me

i'm her bodyguard

haha

haiz

i still thinking bout her

so sad

i miss her alot

T H E E N D

14.01.10

2010-01-14T11:45:00.000-08:00

Woke up around 3pm

wake up late again !

i quickly called nimboy

and

ask where he is

cause

i want him to escort me to sg.wang

to interview a job

thank Yc Chong for offering me this job

so i got ready fast

quickly got out the house and went straight to Tun Sambathan Monorail

buy a ticket to Time Square

and

meet with nimboy after

we went to the Snooker Center located at the 6th floor

we smoke awhile

and

talk alot

we alway talk the same topic

but

we never get tired of it

then waited like around 5pm

me and nimboy went to sg.wang for my job interview

went into the shop and ask the supervisor for job

she said no

while walking out of the shop

i stared at the supervisor

wanna make her scared

haha

here the fuck part of it

i made a promise to my mom

if i can't find a suitable job for me

then

i have no choice to work in a supermarket near my house

if anyone has job offer for me

please help

urgent !!

so anyway

me and nimboy went back to the snooker center and hang out

got a call from keeming

he's asking me to buy for him XXL Crispy Chicken

don't know why many people love that food

after buying the food

i was straight back to Brickfield to yumcha with keeming and Yc Chong

reach to the restaurant around 6.45pm

yumcha till 8pm i think

and

oh yeah !

i took a pic too

haha

it was a pic of three ciggarette box

each of our favourite one

Benson Hedges : Mine

Marlboro Black Menthol : Yc Chong

Red Dunhill : Keeming

PEACE OUT

13.01.10

2010-01-14T10:51:00.000-08:00

Nothing special today

just woke up late as usual

fuck !

always wake up late

evendo set alarm

useless also

my ears can't hear the alarm sound

haha

anyway

keeming call around 7pm if i'm not mistaken

(can't tell what we talk)

i ask him if i could come to his hotel and fetch him

he says okey

but i have to be there like 10pm

so i waited till 9.45pm

played with my computer forawhile

watch some unmeaningful movie

so long to wait

then it's was almost 10pm

i got myself ready

get out the hous

and

walk to tun sambathan monorailwait for like 10 minute

then

the train arrive

going to Hotel Istana at raja chulan

after reaching

saw the Hotel

damn nice

wow !

amazed by it's structure

beside the Hotel got a garden or some sort

nice for taking picture

took some pic

i just wanna take keeming pic

but he force me to take mine too

i hate taking pic of myself

don't know why

T H E E N D

Her

2010-01-12T23:07:00.000-08:00

Why am i still sad ?

Why do i still suffer ?

it is beacuse of HER !

i still love her

i love her more than anything in this world

i really miss her so so much

i still miss when she hold my hands

i still miss when she hugs me

i still miss when everytime we kiss

i miss her voice whenever she speaks to me

the most thing is i miss from HER is

when she tell that she love me

does she knows what i'm going through right now ?

doesn't she knows how much i love her ?

why can't she give me another chance ?

WHY ?

i have change alot since then

but i think it's too late now

she have another boyfriend

my heart is broken

only she can fix it for me

hopefully one day she could give me a chance

i think for now she is happy

but i'm not

she can't understand how i feel every second

i'm so stupid !

you know ?

STUPID !!

i think i won't be the same without her

i tried and tried to get her back

but her answer is still the same

what i should do ?

move on ?

wait for her and never give up ?

i do not want to dissapoint my friends

i just want them to know how i feel that it

i got listen to their advice

i go do what they told me to do

evendo it's hard

i have to sacrifice many things

i have to give up many things

she change my life

i wasn't like before

involving myself to drug usage,gangterism and much more

but when i meet her

my life have change

i got listen to evey word you tell me do and not do

now also i got do what you tell me do

i won't forget it

evendo sometimes you say the word that really hurts me

but i don't care

that didn't stop me from loving you

Can't sleep

2010-01-12T10:32:00.000-08:00

Can't sleep right now

damn !

Why can't i sleep always ?

why do i stay up late ?

What should i do to cure my sleep disorder ?

Somebody help !!

Yesterday

2010-01-12T09:59:00.000-08:00

Didn't slept for 2days

can you imagine that ?

i do not know why i couldn't sleep at all

who cares

at 12.30pm receive one sms from my darling vivian

damn happy !

long time didn't see her

cause she is busy working working working nonstop

on the sms wrote

"James..want go out ma ? we go dating^^"

saw this sms

really felt excited

we were going out at 3pm

still got time to online

while waiting for the time to get to 3pm

i took one picture of me

i don't know why ==

take for fun

give you see

ugly !!!see

ugly right

haha

my phone camera sucks too

damn !!

anyway

around 1.30pm

i got ready

and keeming calledhe said want go yamcha for awhile

after around 2.30pm

me and keeming go to the kl sentral monorail

i was going to Time Square

and

he was going to Raja Chulan to work

after reaching Time Square

i saw vivian

my heart was beating fast

i quickly ran and her

haha

(ps. we're not a couple)

she was suprised to see me

i was too

after talking and walking around with her

my friend Nimboy called me

ask me to meet him at the Snooker center

in there we saw two lenglui

they were playing snooker

O.O

she weren't so good at it

so me and nimboy decided to teach them

haha

we couldn't resist them !!

they were so pretty !!

so we teach them to play

woot woot !

we are two lucky guys !

i caught one of the girl keep looking at my friend

i suspect something already

so i whisper something to my friend ears

"go ask the girl number lahx"

haha

he disagreed at first

then i keep telling nimboy

if the two girls go home

you will regret

when the two girl was leaving

my friend quickly ran to her and ask her number

lucky man !!

then the two girls invite to join them to play pool

waa !

almost give girl beat me

damn !

but eventually i won

NO MERCY !!

haha

The pool table

so small the table

enough for a 12 year old to play

around 6pm

it was time for the two girl to go home

we said our good-byes

and gave them flying kisses

haha

hope to see them again

really had fun with those two girls

then i go find my darling vivian

hoho

then send her home

and

i was straight back home

woot woot !

i had alot of fun yesterday !

T H E E N D !

New

2010-01-12T09:55:00.000-08:00

Made a new blog

Nothing special of it

look kinda ugly

but who cares

I just make it to express my feelings

Let everyone know what going on in my life

That all